Congratulations on the appointment, the honour and dignity conferred on you. You were recruited in the right place at the right time and now you have been given the right authority. It gladdens my heart to see the position you have been raised to, by the mercy and grace of God. You have asked me questions regarding your station and in the light of where you are right now, I will try to answer your pertinent queries to the best of my ability, based both on my experience and expertise in the field, trusting in the wisdom and ways of God, as a forerunner!
The first thing to know, realise and understand, is that you have been called to such a place and position, not by any man but by God Almighty, Creator of heaven and earth. Thus, you must always be aware that you are accountable to Him and must one day stand before His Majesty to give count to Him. Without this clear call from God and assurance from His Spirit, you can never function as a leader over His people. They are His people and He has the right to ordain whom He wants as shepherd over His inheritance, even when socio-cultural norms may dictate otherwise. This is the bedrock of your function, the stable grounding of your service and the impetus for every decision you will take. Remember that No one from the east or the west or from the desert can exalt themselves. It is God who judges: He brings one down; he exalts another (Ps 75:6–7). This is your strength and the hope that will anchor your being to your post, in spite of whatever opposition and vagaries of opinion that may confront you. Like a soldier who doesn’t move until he is commanded to do so, discharge the duties of your position well. This call on your life then is what will make you stand tall on that firm foundation, often needing to encourage yourself, like David in his moment of crisis when all turned against him, for The one who calls you is faithful, and he will do it (1 Thess 5:23–24).
Leadership is not a position of authority and power, but an endowment of responsibility and trust. Nobody can assume or presume to be one, unless it is a grace and a gift, given and bestowed by God. Scripture notes there is no authority except that which God has established. The authorities that exist have been established by God (Rom 13:1–2). Therefore, leadership over the flock entrusted to you is not positional but functional; an opportunity to do the best you can for those entrusted to you with the resources available to you. It is a call to serve others for their benefit using your power to benefit and bless others, not you or your own. Leadership over His people is a matter of service to God and man, not for self-promotion or domination over others or for your own ambitions. Therefore, it is a matter of maturity, holiness, wisdom and power as evidenced by the fact that His leaders instruct their apprentices to set those of impeccable character and integrity in positions of overseeing. Being young, you need to not only let anyone not default you in anything, but also be an example of love, faith and purity for all to follow. In addition, because I was an older woman, I had to pay attention to being serious, dependable and trustworthy. So you are better off than me!
Subservience is born of fear of aggression and abuse, while submission is a willing choice done in the fear of God and trust in Him!
It is very important for you to maintain good conduct for it is the exhibition of your unseen character. So be careful to be groomed inwardly, adorned with the attitude and mind of Christ, paying attention to how you behave before others, for many will be watching you to see if you will fall or fail. Learning to be humble, without selfish ambition and vain conceit must be core of your growth, besides praying, reading the word, tithing, etc. Your inner beauty must enhance and augment your outer trim and swathe, so that your bejeweled appearance is haloed by an inner radiance that attracts with its own charisma. You must not stoop to petty jealousies or quarrels or gossip, but hold your post with poise; be willing to listen and receive input from your team, lead any discussion without being argumentative or aggressive or manipulative and willing worker to those in authority over you. If you were an older woman, you would have the additional task, as I had and have, of teaching younger women how to be homebodies minding their business and not busybodies in others’ affairs!
It is very important for you to breed and foster the right culture, for culture is nothing but a way of life and a way of doing things. Plant and incubate a culture of oneness, camaraderie, goodwill, cooperation and helpfulness, not competition or conspiracy. Do not lower the standards ordained in order to gain favour or please someone or curry favour with those above you, but be willing and ready to state the truth without compromise. Maintain your stance with decency and dignity, not looking down or ill-treating those placed under you, while at the same time able to apologise when you are wrong or when you make a mistake. Don’t claim others’ work as your own or take credit for their solutions, but always seek to promote your team and advertise their contributions. Give reward and credit where it is due and do not elevate yourself or your status by climbing on another’s shoulders, for promotion comes from God. Take care to walk in the fear of God, not man, so that all you do will pass the fiery flames of His testing. When this is your way of life, your team and those below you will follow suit, and thus civilized attitude and behaviour will spread as ripples in a pond or yeast in dough!
Now I have come to what should be the core of your being, the context of your authority, the content of your position and the crown of your person. It has been my sorrow to watch gifted women, born to be leaders and called to be overseers, lose it all because of lacking this Kohinoor diamond of womanhood and queenliness—submission. According to that Chinese saint and stalwart Watchman Nee, submission is not so much an aspect of conduct as much it is a facet of the attitude of the heart, and many women confuse subservient obedience with submission. The former is born of fear of aggression and abuse, while the latter is a willing choice done in the fear of God and trust in Him!
A woman must learn submission if she is a leader who walks and works with authority. The demeanour of a woman leader’s heart is more important than the deportment of her manner and manners. Many well camouflage the raging of their heart and storminess in their mind by an outward show of quietness and calmness, without understanding the outcome of their wrong attitude. God, who sees in secret and who is privy to all secrets of our being, for our substance is not hidden to Him, judges us by our attitudes rather than by our behaviour. I have watched many an apparently soft-spoken woman dig her feet in stubborn sullenness, quietly refusing to comply with instructions of the authority over them. Authority is the umbrella of protection and preservation that God has placed over us and the woman who knows how to walk in it will thrive and flourish with aplomb in her role as a leader. Refusing to walk under it or rejecting its dictates will cause a women become a puppet and a toy of the devil, tossed here and there by him, be overtaken by deception and end up losing the very call that was meant to make them a blessing and a boon to many. Beware Esther, and never rebel against those placed over you as your boss, even when he or she may not be accurate. God you trust will help you and uphold your integrity, fighting on your behalf and defending you before all by a favour.
I think I have given you enough to think through, wrestle with, long for and pray about for a long time.
May you be a shining star in the beauty of His firmament, guiding many with your pure radiance and shedding your light in a dark and perverse world!